Round #2

so we're into the second go 'round with this clomid stuff. last month i had very few side effects. i could tell i ovulated because of all the pressure i was feeling during the time i expected to ovulate. this month, the typical side effects have really hit me. and it sucks. i feel like i'm menopausal. i have hot flashes and i haven't slept well in more than a week. i wake up every night at 2:30 and then again at 4:30--same times. every night. without fail. it's so frustrating. i nearly fell asleep at work yesterday. but when it's time to go to bed, i can't fall asleep to save my life. and i've been dreaming like crazy. strange dreams too. of people trying to kill me. kinda kills the whole idea of restful sleep. i've cut caffeine. i go to bed earlier than is normal for me to see if i'll fall asleep sooner. i still have trouble sleeping. it's awful. i don't like taking sleeping aids so i won't do it. but this is getting ridiculous. there are other side effects i'd rather not discuss but i know that as frustrating as they are, i can probably expect them while (if) i'm pregnant too, so i don't feel like i should complain yet. in the meantime, im drinking ridiculous amounts of fluid and eating lots of fiber. :-/

i am REALLY hoping this cycle is successful. i feel like there's a ton of pressure this time. first of all, i will probably find out if i'm pregnant while we're with a ton of family--not the greatest timing. it it were at like 8-12 weeks, great. but 4 weeks is soooo early. the downside is if i'm not pregnant, i'll be PMSing like crazy around those people and that doesn't sound fun either. but, i'm trying not to think about either of those scenarios yet. right now, we have to focus on all the signs and trying at the right times. it feels like so much work! all these people i know got pregnant by "accident"--no trying. no charting. no timing. just in-the-moment (that just so HAPPENS to be the time she is ovulating). oh well. i have got to stop complaining.