blessing in disguise???

life has been just nuts lately. i feel like work is taking over my life. it's always been a big commitment--sometimes more than i'd like. i've always managed to separate things though, leaving work at work. it's been difficult lately, but mostly because work is following me home and demanding so much more of me. i don't know if it's just because it's this time of year (grant season, audits, accreditation, yada yada), but it just seems so much crazier than normal. on top of that, we're making some big decisions about our future and chris's job. not knowing where i'll be living in 3 months is a little overwhelming. i'm such a planner. i would LOVE to have all of this organized in a pretty color-coded series of post-it notes. instead, my head is spinning with the amount of work stress and lack of clarity about our living situation. so where in all of this is the blessing? i have been so preoccupied by all of this other stuff, i have had less time to dwell on baby stuff lately. don't get me wrong, i still think about it all the time (at least it feels that way). i think about my friends who are due to have babies very soon. i think about what's not happening in my body. i think about the fact that i want to make sure we have a spare bedroom in our next apartment/house just in case. i'm even so pathetic that i went to an accessories party a few weeks ago and bought a bag that really is only useful as a diaper bag. i have no idea what i'll do with it. and i'm too ashamed to admit to chris that i bought it for that purpose. maybe i'll have to give it away. or maybe i'll just tuck it away for now--out of sight--until i can actually have reason to believe it will be useful. okay, did i say i was not thinking about baby's as much? cause clearly i'm still thinking about it a lot. how sad that i feel like this is progress?
i'm trying to take better control of the things i can. i'm exercising more. i'm trying to cut out gluten (read: i love bread). i take my pills every day. i've stopped expecting my period to come. in fact, i'm so used to not having a period it's scary. i joked with chris back in september (my last real period) that i didn't want to have to deal with my period again for a while. this isn't exactly what i had in mind. hopefully i experience some changes here soon. until then, i'll be thankful (???) for the distractions i have now and continue to pray for patience.